four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
