I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
