My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
