PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
