So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize