Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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