I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
