So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
