whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Never joke about your clitoris.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
