We need to rekindle our bromance
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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