I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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