Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
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