I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
