i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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