Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
