Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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