ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize
