This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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