I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
