i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
just found out that she named her cat after me.
50% drunk capacity currently
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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