and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
