Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
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