i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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