So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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