it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
