Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
