$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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