Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize