Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
