I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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