"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
NoShamevember. You game?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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