By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
