you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
