We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
if only i could text you this smell
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
