Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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