hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
