A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize