I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
