Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
