woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
