No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
