We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Man, jail baloney is awful.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
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