Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
And then he peed in my hair
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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