i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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