Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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