Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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