keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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