It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
