i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
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