it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
