He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
