She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
So here I am, sexting at work.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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